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Women's Day

What can arrange, gathered together, three men, two of whom were put on the heads of women's wigs, and the third scarf in addition to the stilettos. Read and find out!
Boris Muradov
This morning was no different from all others. Except for one thing: I woke up with the realization that today I had to become a woman. Where to start, I rackled my head, immediately pull on the tights, and then the broken hour spin at the mirror, the powder of the nose, or first twisting at the mirror, and then try to pack your huge carcass in tights? No, I did not decide to subject myself to the sex change in old age, I did not dare to replenish its persons of transvestites with my person, and even sexual orientation, contrary to the almost harsh fashion, did not intend to change.

Everything was much more prosaic: as well as two other colleagues of my colleagues, the purely masculine had a test of the notorious female cars. What for? So, after all, the notorious on February 14 and March 8 on the nose, and, therefore, following, again, with new -fangled trends, rich Pinocchio will run in a corpsed row in car dealerships to buy four -wheeled gifts to their lover Malvins. Someone in order to win or reinforce the return love of this very Malvina, and someone in this way already, finally, get rid of it and the skin of this Malvina and I and my colleagues have to climb for a couple of days. I don’t know how they are, but in the end I decided to do without tights and makeup, limiting myself to the notorious skin borrowed on the occasion of the KM/h of their corporate red wig and indispensable accessories of any young lady behind the wheel with their own mobile phone in one hand and Long lipstick lented by his wife. Well, I don’t have a third hand for a cigarette, because I don’t smoke, and I didn’t burn myself with a smoke.

In appearance, of course, I am a typical elegant young lady almost two meters of height, a centner of overweight, a braid in the shoulders, a thick beard, so I had to strain all his work in the journalist creative imagination and imagine himself still slim, An elegant young lady tall with a meter with a cap (cap for another half meter) and weighing a bag of potatoes. It is only a pity that not a blonde, but a red tone of a wig. My first BMW X5 car.
Oh, how big to the salon you need to climb the steps like this, I sit. What to do now? Raise the seat higher, and even put the pillows far away, the legs do not reach lower lower in front of a fig, and even this steering wheel needs to be twisted, you also need to move closer to it, and then something interferes, but, yes, this is mine breast! It’s good, small, you won’t even call a bust, otherwise it would be uncomfortable to steer with such a landing, it would be uncomfortable, again, again, a nose, tint your lips, and on the road. I insert the key, press the button

Mother! What is he growling on me like that?! And, yes, this is not on me, it is on everyone around to be afraid! Great! And what is this cute for a little? This, how is it there, well, the program selector? For the first time I see both beautiful, and it is very convenient to use it! Just super! Glam? Let's go interestingly, and 4.8 liters and 350 horsepower is it a lot? Ouch! Ah! Ay-yay! Why is he so jumping? I only pulled up the pulmonary to the pedal, and he immediately jumped. And on an uneven road, it also makes me jump in a chair, like a blank on a spring. Here is a crazy stool! But there is navigation, and I finally do not have to hold a detailed card on the steering wheel, being distracted from this, well, like it

Oh yes, here's the memory of the girl: you need to call a girlfriend on a mobile phone, with the other hand again to tint the gesture of the machine, the machine is still good, he goes so, and where is my duster falling over? Damn, well, what a Fiery HE5 is, from the end to the end, it is not visible here and the very itself is no wonder, not like a bag. AU! I don’t understand at all, why do I need such a huge trunk and a whole sofa behind for a small handbag? What should I carry there? Oh, finally found lipstick and the phone, well, that they were awake around? Goats! Idiots !! Yes, you all just envy me! What are you hatched and yelling? What? Yes, the fool itself !!! Do not see what, on which car I am? Well, shut up! And now I’ll cut it into my eyes, and then I’ll call my husband, I’ll come, he will come and ... so that he, like me, is two tops from the pot, but he has a Hummer generally, he will give you all here !

UV, arrived. Where is she, so healthy, put it? Here and for one car there is no place, and when I park, at least two places at once, I’ll sit on the lawn, and even though the grass doesn’t grow on it large, high borders with the X5 do not care! And now I would still get out, and I’m afraid of a height, help, remove me from here! No, let the notorious macho and those who think about such monsters go, and I will better change with a girlfriend to her brand new Mercedes C280 in a fashionable outfit from AMG (well, this is such a fashion designer, sports outfits for cars sews if anyone is not someone He knows). Lord, what a beautiful car, I just die, one color is worth it! And the doors in it are one less than in X5, less confusion, through which one to climb. No, you can’t climb here, but sit down! The seat is low, comfortable, even cozy. You can raise it higher in order to see at least something ahead.

Does not growl.
Does not jump.
Does not throw up.
Rides smoothly. And quickly, quickly. And it is easily controlled.
And beautiful as inside! And very comfortable.

The mood is super! I will go out on my white handsome! Oh god, what's wrong with him? Just drove from one boutique to another, and already all disgustingly brown-gray, in the tone of Moscow mud. Yes, this is not Rio de Janeiro, like some man, I remember, said, where everything was alladulus in white pants and on the same cars like that, well, what again became aware? Goats! Idiots !! So what, in the middle of the intersection got up? Yes, you all just envy me again! The fool itself !!! You can’t see something, the girl’s problem got dirty. And when it is not white, it is not so stunningly beautiful, but it is still cool to ride it!

But how long will I go on it? My husband gave one of my friends in addition to a bouquet of flowers on March 8 a similar sedan, and what came of it? Previously, on her little Bibika, she washed in the same boutiques, solariums, clubs and friends-girlfriends and did not know grief. And as Mercedes received as a gift, so her husband had to borrow him now and then his car was broken, then he would not start, then she also had it for him to ride on this either. Well, as a result, when his car finally got up, he moved to this Mercedes, and she asked her to buy some kind of little bag again, so that he would not go back anymore

So it’s better and I, until it’s too late, I’ll move it to something simpler, but not quite simple in Peugeot 207 SS. This, you know, is a compartment and a convertible in one bottle, like an air conditioner shampoo and such a pretty little machine, just lovely! Oh, and inside everything is so glamorous and amplified!
True, both the wheels are small, and the lowest on the curb and on the lawn, like on the X5, you will not be wiped out, but in the parking lot there are quite a few places, and you will climb everywhere in traffic jams. Although BMW and Mercedes did not have to climb, they missed it, but now with me at all, well, no one is considered at all, they don’t count for a person! Of course, it’s easy to offend a little one! Well, where, where are you going, and even buzz? Goat! Moron!! And, yes, this is my friend on the X5 Goat! Idiot !! The fool itself !!! On such a huge one to ride is the same as in a purse instead of powdering a cast -iron iron. And nothing that, in comparison with the previous cars, this motor is very weak, I’m not a racer, not Milka Duno and Michael, like him, Schumacher, I have nowhere to hurry. And my baby should be much less on cosmetics.

But the gearbox is correct automatic. And then another husband (well, an idiot!) My friend of my friend gave the same convertible much more powerful, but with this stupid lever in the middle, which must be poked out of and forth. And when to paint the lips? And chatting on the mobile phone? Moreover, it is necessary to rely on the third pedal, until the leg does not dry, while in all normal machines the pedal only two are like here. The doors here are also only two one for me, the other for my girlfriend. And even behind the front seats, the back is specially available for bags of boutiques. Because the roof moves into the trunk when this machine turns into a convertible, and you can’t put many packages there. But I removed the roof, and here I, please, admire me, to my beauty’s beauty, from which the roof is already moving away! And let the friends sit so, not interesting to anyone, in their tin dungeons behind tinted glasses for me, so there is no such puff for a girl there is no car and cannot be!
Dmitry Krotov

What a hard time a journalist share is! Heavier than the notorious female. And if these shares are also folded, but since it is necessary, then it is necessary. However, having considered the idea of \u200b\u200ba test of female cars, I, unlike my colleagues, decided to idealize the situation. And, for the entourage, having wrapped a bright red BOA around the neck and staffing it with an equally shouting wig, I tried to imagine which woman would be appropriate to drive in a particular car. I found that in this situation it would be quite reasonable to divide the weaker sex into social and age categories. Fortunately, the cars themselves contributed to this. And this is what came of all this.

Let's start small with a pretty lion cub Peugeot 207 CC. Behind his wheel I am a student. A carefree pretty student. Pigik most likely, a gift for the 18th anniversary of the most important man in life at this moment from his father (although, of course, more dubious options are possible). Youth disorder and recklessness follows the main advantage of this car, the opportunity to drive without a roof. And even if the air of the metropolis does not differ in cleanliness, let the wind trembled, in spite of adults, green hair, but the whole district can hear music, everyone pays attention to the beauty dancing to the beat. And the fact that the motor with a machine gun does not do not care about the first training car Peugeot will fit quite.

Having adopted, you can even tumble into turns at high speed the suspension will not fail. Is the salon not rich? So the 207th converts costs not so expensive. Of course, if the roof is raised, and no one can appreciate the cheerfulness of the owner, the carriage again turns into a pumpkin, or rather, into an ordinary (well, still almost ordinary) small Peugeot. And the attitude towards him on the road, as to any other small car corresponding: everyone strives to oppress and cut. But without a struggle there is no victory, and the nerves of the youth are stronger than the old people. Therefore, at such a playful age, this car is the most.

I am transplanted to the BMW X5 and I understand that now, in theory, to a completely different age and social category. X5 Gift of an oligarch-muzha. It is the husband. A man is unlikely to give this house on wheels worth two hundred pieces of greenery, his next unverified girlfriend. Here I am a solid married lady, most likely with children. Or maybe without. But then why is this huge barn, where, without standing your feet on the seat, you will not reach the mirror?

Perhaps the woman is just tired of constant collisions while driving a small -leaf? Maybe the kids exhausted all the nerves, and for the battle in traffic jams there are no longer left? Or maybe my husband wanted to protect his family as much as possible? But, I must admit, most often the fifth in the hands of a woman is a tool of self -affirmation. After all, she is the wife of the oligarch! And then it becomes clear why all these victims of flour in the parking lot, an impressive consumption of gasoline, a difficult entrance-output with jumping on a slippery footboard and the absolute lack of a sense of dimensions. All this so that no one dares impudently to the crossroads or screaming something about a monkey with a grenade out the window. In order to be higher (in the literal and figurative sense) of many men. My x5 is my well -armed with a powerful engine!

Between the solid married young ladies and students, another category falls exactly. Let's call her independent. These women may be by no means deprived of beauty and the ability to turn their heads to a peasant. But it so happened that they still have a couple, as practice shows, not so necessary for most qualities, this is mind and enterprise. A kind of woman-app. Therefore, they did not go along the path already known to us to marry the oligarch and do not go to X5. And they have no children yet. Not up to them. After all, they (oh, horror!) Work. And they work seriously, a lot. They can even buy a car on their own. So why don't they buy Mercedes from class? Moreover, so pale white in the beautiful body kit from AMG. As a rule, these women also like to just drive a car. They will appreciate its excellent dynamics and controllability. And while traveling with friends shopping, you can easily throw it into a spacious trunk. Perhaps the keyword is expediency.

Mercedes sedan is good in everything. He is beautiful, noble, has excellent running qualities and is not crowded. And all this for all a moderate price for a car moderate price. Of course, you will not carry the trailer on it, and you will not take the refrigerator in it, as in X5. And you can’t save the roof, as in Peugeot. But does it often arise in this? Independent girls are quite enough that these are Mercedes and that it is quick and practical. But we all know the world is far from perfect. Especially the world in which we live. To meet a fragile girl on Hummer or a serious man on SLK on the streets of the Russian capital is easy. Everything was mixed in the Oblon house. But, you see, a woman with children looks at the wheel of Peugeot 207 CC rather strange. A twenty -year -old student on the BMW X5 is generally Moveton. Therefore, I choose the Mercedec C280, like an ultra -aminal car. He, with some stretches and social reservations, would have approached any of my fictional heroines. However, he suits any man quite. And this is his charm
Maxim Bordunov

There is an opinion that a woman is also a person. The statement, whatever one may say, is very controversial, but there is undoubtedly the share of truth in it. And if so, then nothing human is alien to the woman, including car drive. Such is in general terms my attitude towards women at the wheel: without condemnation and even more contempt, but with some sense of absurdity of the situation. The male chauvinistic pig in my subconscious with perseverance worthy of better use periodically perceives a woman in a car as something as absurd as a woman with a gun or with a hockey club. So do not blame ... putting on a scarf in the manner of the movie stars of the 60s (according to colleagues in the manner of an evil old woman), I am thinking with which car to get used to getting used to the image of a woman while driving and, following my ideas about female logic, I choose a car the most beautiful. This, of course, is dazzling white Mercedes C280. When we decided that in a company with a toy cabylet of Peugeot and an off-road-sporting monster BMW there should be some elegant Merce, our good friends from the Mercedes-Benz dealer center on

The Novorizhskoye Shosse themselves offered us this particular car as a female version. After all, the new C-Class perfectly combines the chic of a luxury car and the relative availability at a price, which is important, regardless of who the girl or her man orders the music.

The white color of a noble cream shade makes the car a real fashionable thing. If Tseshka were my friend, I would have called her and would cease to be friends with her: she is too impeccable, you can’t do anything, you feel some unattainable ideal in her. The entire jewelry is the decoration of the body and the salon is selected with an impeccable taste and attention to the details. The only thing that annoys me a little is the absence of a star over the radiator grille. On the

C280 In the Avantgarde configuration, a huge proprietary emblem is attached to the lattice itself, and in the Murziki I love to look at the road through a star on the hood, which men call the sight. Burning into the image according to the Stanislavsky system, in C280 I tried to join the pedals in women's stilettos. It turned out not so inconvenient as the popular rumor claims, but the heel will be eating on the floor and will probably rip off with time. So now I understand that the ladies, who, sitting behind the wheel, change their shoes into special driver's slippers Tod's, do not dig, but on the contrary, act extremely pragmatic. And how sweet it is different and you can’t say Tseshka rides! Of all the intricate car slogans, I only remember Mercedesovsky: from home to house, without leaving home. C280 is very consistent with this mantra. Feng Shui in the salon

allows you to instantly forget about the mud on the street, moving home from the guests. And with all this, Tseshka accelerates and steer perfectly, so all sorts of hooligan tricks on the road to wipe his nose with deds on SUVs, this car is fine. And his own daddy will fully pull the purchase of such a car for a beloved girl. But the beauty of the cake is that this wonderful machine can easily be bought for your own, without even being the owner of an oil company and the mistress of the sea, for example, just a successful middle -sized manager and this will not be a fashionable trinket, but not a stupid show Quite a self -sufficient car.

But sometimes the girl wants the car to be a fashionable trinket. In the end, if it is necessary on business, then men will be taken. In my opinion, Peugeot 207 CC is best suited for the role of such a trinket. Although compared with the old toy 206 CC, this is a sample of solidity. But there are actually no rear seats, the trunk is tiny, the general style is still semi -playing. But you can remove the roof and literally ventilate your head after a quarrel with a boyfriend, grabbing the night avenue. And among the friends, the reputation of a fatal woman is guaranteed: this is what men know that 207 CC is only an ordinary 207th with an unusual body, and in a female society about the mistress of this peg will certainly be struggling to talk about a girl on a convertible.

But the charm of 207 CC is quickly boring, and the car begins to irritate the little things. A ride without a roof in our area is far from every day, but to amuse a sluggish motor and a dull automatic entertainment regular and very dubious. Of course, the compactness of the pepper helps out in the city crowd and in the parking lot, but on the same Mercedes C280 you also do not feel like an elephant in a bowl shop. In general, relations with Peugeot 207 CC are akin to a resort novel: emotions are a storm, but they do not last long. He is some kind of frivolous.

Whether the BMW X5 is the case. That's where seriousness is so seriousness! The bores say that women (as, indeed, men) with a complex of inferiority drive on large cars. What a stupidity! Maybe these wise men also do not like big female breasts? I like X-fifth, especially in a new guise. So convincing and calm. You can and I want to rely on it, I want to trust his 355-horsepower power. A lonely girl in this SUV may well feel like a stone wall. Of course, 3 million rubles are a considerable price for a sense of superiority that X5 4.8i gives, but this car costs its money even in an inexperienced female look.

The same bores love to grumble that, they say, the girl is just such a hefty car. Purely theoretically, maybe nothing, but reality makes its own adjustments. After all, all these boring boods on rusty Lada or credit focuses believe that no one except them on the road exists, and if they see a girl while driving, they completely fall into fury. In general, typical black envy. Therefore, it is necessary that such road users first see the car, and only then its driver. X5 quickly, but delicately puts road boors in place: from a large black SUV sparkling with xenon, it does not shy away from it carefully. Not like a love, of course, but, alas, a different woman in today's city traffic cannot survive. We can say that X5 replaces male impudence to the weak sex, which means that it protects nerves, helps to avoid wrinkles, hair loss, and then on the list. And the dimensions of the BMW SUV are scared only at first: due to the high landing, excellent visibility and the sense of dimensions of the machine allow you to drive on the X-five, as I personally convinced, at least through the needle ears (only the needle should still be quite large). In addition, other drivers, in which case, will again fearfully give in.
In general, it turns out, paradoxically, that it is best for women to ride BMW X5. True, there is a whole series if ... if there is money for it. If the size and image of the car do not contradict the refined inner world of the young lady. If you do not care about reproaches in the inferiority complex

Afterword
Not so long ago, the concepts of a female car in our country did not exist as such a domestic auto industry proposed either purely male Volga and Muscovites, or unisex in the form of Lada. With the beginning of the massive inflow, the concept of a female car came to our market of foreign cars. But in the classical sense it did not last long, having undergone an amazing metamorphosis today: now a female car in Russia is not only a Mini -Mini typewriter and a compact SUV, but also a large SUV, and an expensive powerful sedan, previously former purely male.
So we allowed ourselves this comic shape and a rather serious comparative test of incomparable cars in content and meaning, trying not so much to use our professional experience, but to look at the problem through the eyes of the female representatives themselves, which are increasingly praised, not always smoothly in the same way And the already close rows of motorists. At the same time, we tried to be as objective as possible, but, probably, it was not without the influence of the notorious male chauvinism. The point, however, is not that. All three of the tested cars themselves are good, each in their own way. And we just tried to understand which one is more feminine in the modern Russian sense. And opinions, as you see, were divided (it is quite possible that it is precisely depending on the degree of mentioned chauvinism).
But do not forget that these are still the opinions of men, albeit appointing women for a couple or two hours. That's right: after all, statistics are inexorably indicating that most cars that women drive, either donated by men, or are bought for their money.
However, women themselves, not without reason, believe that they have the right to drive a car that she likes more. The main thing is not to forget that the machine as a means of transportation is a thing that requires much more responsibility than, for example, washing machine, due to improper handling of which you can easily flood the neighbors from below. And men should not forget that the woman remains a woman while driving and requires at least a little condescending attitude. Although through tinted glasses of another SUV at a price and the size of a house you can’t even break down which floor the driver. Note: In the process of conducting the test, not a single car and not a single woman were injured.